![\"Kunekune](\"http:\/\/www.charmedlife.co.nz\/cowboybootsandbrokenfingers\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/10\/Nell-2.jpg\")
<\/a>At the time of the events recorded here, Nell was only about this size. Photo by Mira<\/a>.<\/p><\/div>\n It was our family thermometer, the one I use to closely monitor my nearest and dearest when they complain of a headache. Since hearing about\u00a0Clive Wearing<\/a>\u00a0in a psychology lecture I have a morbid fear of encephalitis (thanks for that tertiary education), and the kids got quite good at pre-empting my questions.\u00a0‘Yes mum, I can look at a bright light and put my chin \u00a0on my chest’*, ‘Go on then take my temperature’.<\/p>\n Anyway, since it’s the only one we have, on this day it was that same thermometer I was sliding into Nell’s rear. Family members will be relieved to know that I popped it into the finger of a latex glove first for purposes of hygiene (so we’re all good yes?).<\/p>\n Nell was really sick. We were in no doubt about this, as she had declined to eat breakfast. It takes a lot to make a pig stop eating, and when they do, things are critical. I’d tried hand feeding her and dripping water into her mouth, to no avail. I was on the phone to the vet. The advice was to take her temperature, so here we were.<\/p>\n The good news? Her temperature was normal (for a pig). The vet’s next hypothesis; could Nell have have eaten something poisonous? Okay, like what?\u00a0I consulted Dr. Google.<\/p>\n Nell, recovered, and being a muddy pig.<\/p><\/div>\n And was informed that pretty much everything<\/em> is toxic to pigs. The list was so long it made me wonder how sus scrofa domesticus<\/a>\u00a0have made a go of the evolutionary process at all. After a quick scan of the pig pen though, I was able to confirm it was free of any of the named toxins, with the possible exception of a large eucalyptus tree. Could this be the cause of Nell’s sore tummy? The bark around the base of the trunk did look a bit nibbled. Best be on the safe side and move the pigs.<\/p>\n Pig moving at that time involved dismantling and re-erecting a temporary fence consisting of 25 metres of electrified mesh<\/a>. Relocating Nell was no problem, she was too sick to leave the large dog kennel which was serving as a pig house. Fig, by contrast, once the mesh was down, saw wide open spaces and legged it. If I had known more about how Summer would react to a piglet running loose in the paddock I might have moved the ponies out of the area first. Only I didn’t.<\/p>\n Picture this pony looming over you with a much less benevolent expression, ‘MY paddock young pig’.<\/p><\/div>\n Chaos ensued. Fig ran. Summer chased Fig, looking as if she might stomp on her (wild pigs eat wild ponies, and Summer was taking no chances). I tried to place myself between the piglet and the pony, all the while telling Summer ‘no’ whilst trying to scoop up our little escapee. I can tell you right now there’s nothing like a few laps around a paddock to improve your fitness<\/a>, and to make you wish fervently that you had signed up for a nice straightforward gym circuit programme<\/a>\u00a0instead of a farmlet.<\/p>\n To top things off, by the time I managed to catch Fig and get everyone settled again, the puppy<\/a> inside our house had become so agitated she’d destroyed an armchair (Act of Dog). Nell recovered. The armchair, did not.<\/p>\n So was the culprit the eucalyptus, in the paddock, with the So there you have it, a pig tale about the tail end of a pig. And by the way, if you need to check your temperature, you can find the thermometer in the hall cupboard. Don’t all rush at once.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n * Symptoms of encephalitis for anyone who wants to start worrying are a headache, with some or all of: a stiff neck, photosensitivity, vomiting and a raging temperature. You’re welcome!<\/p>\n <\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" There are not too many stories that start: “So, let me tell you about the time I inserted a thermometer into a pig’s bottom”. This is one of them. It was our family thermometer, the one I use to closely… Continue Reading <\/a><\/a>lead pipe<\/del> toxic bark<\/a>? I don’t think we’ll ever really know, but all’s well that ends well, as a certain famous playwright once said. And it did. End well. Even for the chair, which, truth to tell had been on my reupholstery list for some years.<\/p>\n